Paperback Writer

I’ve been thinking a lot about Paperback Writer while I work on the line edits of my book.

For those infants and philistines amongst you who don’t know, Paperback Writer was a song by the Beatles, a mop-topped bunch of British hippies who would probably be the world’s greatest rock & roll band if it hadn’t been for Led Zeppelin (also a bunch of long-haired British hippies).

The premise of the song was that the singer was an aspiring writer trying to get published, and the lyrics are his query letter. Like many writers looking for their first break, this guy was desperate for attention and the good will of the nameless, faceless publisher, and willing to do just about anything to get it, including sacrificing any and all artistic integrity. He’ll make it shorter, make it longer, change it in any way they want, if they’ll just give him a break.

This was how I felt when I was writing The Painted Man and shopping it around. Shit, part of me even feels that way now. Writing fantasy novels for a living has been my life’s dream for as long as I can remember, and though I never actually expected it to happen, I would have done most anything to make it happen, even sold out my babies, the precious characters I created and breathed life into on the computer screen.

But after the sale, it was surprising how fast that changed. At first, it was me debating big things with agents and editors; is the book better or worse off without the prologue? How important is chapter 7? Would the book be improved if I moved it? Cut it? Rewrote it entirely? Was character X in character when they told off character Y?

Sure, I had lost some of that “I’ll do anything if you print this” attitude, but that’s good, right? You don’t want to shoot yourself in the foot over artistic integrity, but you also don’t want to do anything to make the end product with your name on it worse than it started.

Now, though, I find myself internally wrestling with a strange kind of… indignance over stupid shit. Like, “What? How can anyone not appreciate the masterful way I streamlined that sentence by removing unnecessary indefinite articles to improve narrative flow? I left that “a” out on purpose!”

My mom says she’s been on the lookout for me to start getting full of myself ever since I got the book deal. I think this is it. I’d better get that shit under control tout de suite before I start yelling at people for using sugar instead of Equal in my latte.

Paperback writer

Paper back writer (paperback writer)
Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book?
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
It’s based on a novel by a man named Lear
And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer,
Paperback writer.

It’s the dirty story of a dirty man
And his clinging wife doesn’t understand.
His son is working for the Daily Mail,
It’s a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer,
Paperback writer.

Paperback writer (paperback writer)

It’s a thousand pages, give or take a few,
I’ll be writing more in a week or two.
I can make it longer if you like the style,
I can change it round and I want to be a paperback writer,
Paperback writer.

If you really like it you can have the rights,
It could make a million for you overnight.
If you must return it, you can send it here
But I need a break and I want to be a paperback writer,
Paperback writer.

Paperback writer (paperback writer)

Paperback writer – paperback writer
Paperback writer – paperback writer

I wonder how long it will be before my wife sees this post and puts some sort of Beatles trivia in the comment section? Any bets?

Posted on February 15, 2008 at 8:52 pm by PeatB
Filed under Craft, Musings, Writing
6 Comments »

6 responses to “Paperback Writer”

  1. How about the fact that John and George are singing “Frere Jacques” in their backing vocals? Does that count as trivia?

    (Oh, and The Beatles ARE the greatest rock ‘n’ roll band. So there.)

    Posted by dani, on February 15th, 2008 at 9:08 pm
  2. How about the fact that after an hour and a half, I still can’t get that damn YouTube video to work in Firefox, only in IE?

    Argh.

    Zeppelin rules!

    Posted by Peat, on February 15th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
  3. The Youtube video works fine on Firefox. Correction: The Youtube video works fine on Firefox once I turn off the noscript add-on.

    Posted by Myke, on February 16th, 2008 at 9:28 am
  4. Your post brings me back to some conversations I’ve had with “Bob” in the past where he was lamenting on how difficult it is to be a fantasy writer. Albeit, he was saying this after much success which I believe came from endless hard work and often compromise.
    I do feel you’re going about it very open minded; trying to keep your integrity intact and also realizing it is a process with many others that have a say as well at this point. I think the end product will speak for itself.

    Posted by Jay, on February 18th, 2008 at 11:55 am
  5. I love how RA Salvatore is just “Bob” to you. The dude has written like 50 books, half of them bestsellers, and was an enormous influence on both our current careers.

    Here’s hoping I have a fraction of his prolificacy and success.

    Posted by PeatB, on February 19th, 2008 at 4:45 pm
  6. Yeah, but Jay will still call you Pete instead of Peat! 🙂

    Posted by dani, on February 20th, 2008 at 6:22 pm